The Sixes
After the tumult of the number five, we come to the number six.
Geometrically speaking, six is often seen in the form of a hexagon, a shape seen with an uncanny regularity in nature and in the universe, from honeycombs to the planet Saturn. This is not a coincidence: As it turns out, hexagons are the most efficient and mechanically stable shape for packing that uses equal size units, while minimizing wasted space. This explains why honeycombs are packed with hexagonal structures, even though they originally have circular units when constructed by honeybees. It may also explain the hexagon on Saturn: It has been described as being a current of high speed gases in the atmosphere (analogous to the jet stream on Earth) circling its north pole, compressed by its interaction with multiple cyclones. These interations tightly pack it into a dense space at the North Pole, causing the hexagonal shape to arise.
This is all to say that six represents a return to stability; a return (or restoration if you will) to harmony and balance. At least for now, everything is as it should be. Another way to think about it is that from the number five (three plus two), we have the number six (three plus three): a doubling of the sacred and joyous number three.
We see this in the Six of Cups, a card commonly associated with nostalgia and a return to more innocent times in the past. But there’s more going on here than just looking back at the past with rose-tinted glasses. The main feature here is the taller child (who also looks like they are older) giving the cup with the white lily to the smaller child (who also looks like they are younger).
Symbolically, I feel like this is a representation of the more privileged and more powerful sharing their wealth with the less privileged and less powerful.
The presence of the lilies, bearing the colour white (the colour of purity) suggests that this is done out of a noble, morally honest intention, as opposed to the Six of Pentacles, which leaves more room for ambiguity. More than a scene depicting the purity and innocence of charity, it also illustrates the healing quality of the energy exchange that happens when those who have more share with those who have less. This extends the meaning of the card to go beyond just sharing wealth. It can mean an ace or aro couple, or an ace or aro person in a relationship, extending the emotional space and companionship they have with their partner to other ace and aro people in their orbit, who are feeling lonely and bereft of human connection.
Another insight is that the sixes are also about the flow of give and take. Across all four of the six cards in the tarot, there is a consistent theme that arises, centred around how the act of give and take leads to an exchange and the act of sharing between people leads to a new equilibrium.
And speaking of an exchange, or sharing, we have the Six of Pentacles, which at first glance seems like a simple, straightforward card about charity and sharing…but again, not all is as it seems. Two people, who from their clothing appear to be beggars, are asking for money from the person in the middle. Yet, the man in red gives only to the figure on the left; his favoured position is also hinted at in that three pentacles appear above his head.
Beyond that, we have some interesting questions: the figure in yellow is recieving money; but what about the person in blue? There is no money shown in their hand, and there is no sign that the person in the middle is going to acknowledge them being there. Did the rich person in red, in the middle, simply just not get to them yet, or did they deem them somehow unworthy? Maybe the rich person just happened to notice the person in blue mistreating or taking something from the person in yellow. Maybe there’s something we’re just not seeing with the person in blue (especially underneath that cloak), that the rich person can possibly see at their angle. A clue are the scales in the rich man’s hand (a call back to Justice), which are level and balanced. What’s happening here is just and fair; giving to the person in yellow first is the just and fair thing to do, because they are in greater need. The classical imagery of equity versus equality comes to mind here: not giving to the person in blue may not be an example of equality, but it is definitely more likely a matter of equity. Again, through the flow of give and take, we are brought back into equilibrium.
I can think of all sorts of personal interactions with people throughout one’s daily life and working day, where being charitable or stressing fairness and equity would be an excellent theme to work with. But for ace and aro people, fairness and equity have a special meaning and significance; those who identify as asexual or aromantic, or who place themselves on the asexual and aromantic spectrums face considerable discrimination and prejudice from a wider culture that prioritizes and upholds toxic normative sexuality and amatonormativity. It also faces prejudice from society thanks to the persistence of myths and misinformation about asexuality and aromanticism that continue to circulate in popular culture. Here though, is an opportunity and a time for those wrongs to be made right; the news that states like Massachusetts have now formally recognized ace week, and the (slowly) increasing visibility of asexuality in pop culture media (like books and TV shows) is to me, the energy of the Six of Cups and Six of Pentacles acting to give us a more fair degree of representation and acceptance in wider society.
Fairness and harmony also relate to the relationship that the greater ace community has had with more marginalized aces, such as BIPOC aces, neurodivergent aces, and disabled aces. Needless to say, much work still has to be done to ensure that the voices and experiences of marginalized aces and aros are given the respect they are due.
The Six of Swords also illustrates a flow of give and take, this time being the give and take of someone bringing us to another place — a place that promises healing and restoration. The destination appears to be a peaceful place with still and calm waters, a far cry from the turbulent currents they are fleeing on the boat’s starboard side. This is not a journey that was taken lightly, as seen in the hunched over, sorrowful look of the person in yellow robes sitting down in the boat.
For aro and ace people, this may connect to people’s experiences with friends or relationships that may, retrospectively, have played a part in aiding them on their journey. Examples of this could include former friends and lovers. Perhaps their presence, however fleeting and/or painful they may have been, may have been important to help you move from an older, less infomed and less open mindset about queer or ace and aro people, to one that is more affirmative, more open, and more accepting. Perhaps this scene also represents current friends, partners, or chosen family who have helped you move on from violent and abusive households. Or perhaps it is you who is in the driver’s seat of the boat, helping a fellow aro or ace person navigate the troubled waters of their abusive and toxic environments. The friendships forged in these situations are not just important; they are powerful and perhaps, even life saving.
Where else can we go when we escape from a place of toxicity, and sadness, than to a well-earned victory parade in the Six of Wands? Here, we are carrying the victory wreath. Here, it is us, and clearly us, who is being celebrated. If we think of this sequence of cards as a journey in and of itself, this almost represents the end point of the restoration of balance. If we started this little side journey into the tarot as someone severely impoverished in the Six of Pentacles, we have the ability to end it as someone who is victorious in the Six of Wands. Perhaps our next question might be what that victory would look like for ace and aro people.
On a more individual scale, that might be the vindication of the personal struggles you endured in the Six of Pentacles, or in the Fives. It might look like effecting ace-positive change in the hearts and minds of members of your family, social groups, or in your community. It might mean a positive resolution to the escape you mounted in the Six of Swords. Or it could look like your reaping what you had sown in the Six of Cups: Out of your past choice to share your privilege and resources with those less fortunate, you have now found that energy revisited to you, either through more material opportunities, and wealth, or more friends and allies who can help you get plugged into more social circles.
On a broader scale, victory could look like a greater representation of asexual and aromantics as valid queer identities in government, education, and professional institutions. It could look like more representation in popular media, more amplified voices of community leaders and activists, or our “Ellen moment” (as referred to by Angela Chen), where the ace and aro community find their banner being championed by a celebrity of monumental success, fame and visibility.
Whatever victory may look like to you, it is yours to enjoy and savour.
